Dear Annie: I’m an avid gardener in a suburban neighborhood, and in turn, I meet lots of neighbors. There’s one lady who keeps stopping by with questions about her yard, which I’m happy to help answer. She even asked if I would go with her to the local nursery to help her select new plants for her garden bed, to which I agreed.
She canceled at the last minute via text. No apologies were given. Since then, she’s knocked on my door and continues to text me with questions without a please or thank you. Her last text said she was able to pick up plants on a specific day but wasn’t feeling well enough to plant them (hint hint). All this after I’ve told her no, this doesn’t work for me.
My husband suggested quoting her a rate for my services. However, I have no desire to communicate on any level with her. Is it rude to block her and ignore her?
—Plant Peeved
Dear Plant Peeved: It’s not rude to stand by your boundaries. You were generous with your time and knowledge, and when someone repeatedly disrespects that, they lose their access to it.
You’ve already told this woman no, and she hasn’t listened. At this point, blocking or ignoring her may be the only way forward. Since you’re neighbors, if you prefer to keep things cordial, you could send a brief and final message recommending a local gardener or service she can contact instead if she wants to.
Friendship of any sort should be a two-way street. You don’t deserve to be taken for granted.
“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
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